the politically incorrect alphabet

Blank card


Mafia/Mobster, Manhole, Mao, Marketing, Match, Menorah, Mermaid, Mine, Monkey, Muff, Mushroom

illustrated threads linked above, unillustrated suggestions listed below…


Posted on: 5 July 2006, 1:00am

mace, either the scary-looking medieval weapon (which, now that i've realized, would sort of resemble the mine...) or the pepper-spray.

The Headmaster
Posted on: 5 July 2006, 4:38pm

Or the nutmeg derived spice, though that's not politically incorrect. We have a mace on this site already (in a supporting role) - see 'king'.

Posted on: 5 July 2006, 9:39pm

ahh, i see. but it's not the big scary spikey kind.

it's the nice, regal round one.


The Headmaster
Posted on: 21 May 2006, 12:56pm

Since the Age of Enlightenment, a modern educationalist wishes to teach their charges the value of the scientific method. Notwithstanding Clarke's third law ("Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic") we should always seek to find the rational explanation rather than succumb to superstition. So 'Magic' is unPC, from a teacher's viewpoint.

Perhaps illustrated by a rabbit being yanked by the ears from a top hat?

See also 'Voodoo' and 'Witch'.

Dogs are happy to believe in magic, one of my cats too will refuse food until I have used cat magic on it - I touch it, then he'll eat it. You might think this is silly, but is it any more foolish than the common human belief that the value and desirability of an article sewn in a SE Asian sweatshop can be magically transformed by stitching a Nike 'swoosh' to it?

See also 'Marketing'.


The Eager Young Lad
Posted on: 19 October 2005, 9:46pm

In uniform, all frills and smiles, no decency. Garnish with silver platters, brooms and other household objects to taste.


Posted on: 31 October 2005, 2:16pm

I believe the PC term is now "Postal Carrier" or something like that.

The Headmaster
Posted on: 31 October 2005, 5:59pm

Two nations separated by a common language. In the UK the person delivering parcels and letters ('the post') is a postman or postwoman, both still acceptable words, so 'M' doesn't enter into it.

Posted on: 31 October 2005, 6:02pm

I agree there's a minor problem with the two variations of the language. Thank you for clarifying the differences and for being so understanding on some of my posts. I think I'm starting to get a better feeling for the type of things you're looking for.

Marquis de Sade


M is for the Marquis!


The Headmaster
Posted on: 23 May 2006, 1:27pm

Karl that is, not Groucho, Chicco, Harpo and Zeppo. Or Gummo.

An increasing number of people have started thinking that Karl Marx wasn't so 'wrong' after all - in a recent vote for the greatest philosopher of all time (organised by the BBC Radio 4 program "In Our Time") he won by a wide margin.

See also Lenin, Stalin, Mao...



M is for massochists!


The Headmaster

Central, and probably phallic, symbol of the Mayday celebrations which were not uncommon in the UK not so long ago. But now they're condemned as being pagan celebrations of spring, and so anathema to PC left and religious right both.

See also 'Halloween'.


Fairy Princess
Posted on: 13 November 2005, 4:58pm

People with dwarfism claim that calling them midgets is offensive as they are actually dwarves. The TV told me so.

The Headmaster
Posted on: 14 November 2005, 10:38am

Do midgets then object to being called dwarves? Do midgets object to dwarves objecting to being called midgets? Do you get ructions between the freak show denizens and the clown's little helpers? I expect so, though the TV doesn't always add the all important detail does it?

There will of course be a proper encompassing PC term... err, not short-arse, something else like 'person of differently extended stature'. See also 'Dwarf'.

Anyway, I think we can fit an Oompa Loompa in one way or the other.


The School Bully

An example of a term which should have been un-PC, but which has now just taken on the meaning of referring to a health care provider who assists a birth. So not really worthy of the alphabet, just a kind of observation.

The School Bully

Ah, I see. According to wikipedia, the term means 'with woman', and so you could hardly call this un-PC if it was referring to women only, since the gender distinction is with the person giving birth, and you could hardly complain that it's the fault of the language that men can't do that.


The Lawyer
Posted on: 28 November 2005, 11:44pm

Minstrel, as in black and white: (not harlequin) we used to watch these; didn't we know better? We do now. What would the equivalent be the other side of the pond? Another one my father-in-law used to enjoy tormenting us with.


Posted on: 2 March 2006, 2:59pm

Wha better way to please our Islamic friends tahn by depicting their prophet. Go on, double Dane dare you.

The Headmaster
Posted on: 2 March 2006, 6:41pm

The idea that any representation of The Prophet Mohammed is totally forbidden is not universal in Islam, and there are plenty of examples to confirm this - such as

However, they know where I live and Saddam's missing WMDs can be made ready to fire in 45 minutes.

See the comment under 'Prophet'.

Posted on: 3 March 2006, 3:20pm

However surely by any form of drawing you are in fact of defiance of Allah (well especially drawing the eyes). Islamic artists alwys put in a dilliberate "mistake" because to do otherwise is to challenge God in some way. Apparently as only we Allah can acheive perfection (or create).

Well it sounded like a good excuse after failing my A-levels because I didn't do any work.

The Headmaster
Posted on: 6 March 2006, 11:38am

You're right about the deliberate mistakes, that's why I ensure none of my illustrations attain perfection!

One strand of Islamic thinking maintains that any representational art is offensive, and that art should only consist of calligraphy from the Koran and geometric patterns. Even then, a weaver or tiler (say) will introduce an error in their work. Less strict thinking still forbids showing the eyes as you say - I visited some tiny churches in the mountains of Cyprus last year, recognised 'world heritage sites' with walls covered in mediaeval frescos of saints. C20th Turkish invaders had scratched out the eyes.

Strangely, when it comes to film and photography the representation of humans is generally allowed, even by the loony wing, otherwise how would people be able to tote their placards of Osama*?

* photos/bert_osama_poster.jpg

This well known poster (with Bert peaking over Osama bin Laden's left shoulder) is genuine: some lowly paid (and now probably ex) graphic designer left Bert in from a downloaded image and it obviously wasn't spotted before going to print. See www.snopes.com/rumors/bert.htm for the story.


Jonathan Katz
Emailed on 10 June 2007

As Autobahn: again, gas-guzzling..



Mussolini the facist, maybe?

The Headmaster

Yes, the much loved 'Il Duce', turncoat socialist, able propagandist, political thug and totalitarian dictator. Friend of Franco and ally to Hitler. Not so popular in Ethiopia, say, whose inhabitants he doused with chemical weapons. He has the advantage of being easily recognisable, with his jutting jaw and puffed up chest.

I was in Rhodes a few years ago, which had been under Italian rule from 1912-1947. It was noticeable that where flags from many nations were displayed in the airport the Italian one was absent, likewise I don't remember us coming across any 'Italian' restaurants.


Wow....that's kinda sad, but I guess they're sticking it to Italy.

When I began posting on this site, I had Mussolini in mind, but I could not remember the guy's name to save my life. It was somewhere in the back of my mind, and I was tempted to just post, "That Italian facist," but I decided against it, praying I would remember soon.

Turns out I remembered it when I visited the Smithsonian American History Museum on Sunday. My boyfriend and I were looking at the World War I & II exhibits and I suddenly saw "Mussolini" and shouted, "MUSSOLINI! THAT'S IT!"

He looked at me like I was insane, so I tried explaining this site to him. I was not too sure if he understood, so I showed him a few of the flashcard images I saved to my iPod.

He really loves them. He thinks they're "genius" and "hilarious" :)

The text on this page is archived from The Politically Incorrect Alphabet Forum - which unfortunately broke on August 2nd 2006 through overuse. A list of completed un-PC illustrations and their archived threads can be found here.

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