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Match

The Headmaster
Posted on: 25 November 2005, 1:55pm

Because children shouldn't play with matches.

I still remember the first box of matches I ever owned, found on a London pavement and squandered trying to light damp leaves. Later on we graduated to seeking out builders' empty Tizer bottles and spending the deposit money on paraffin - 1/3d a bottle it was, quite a lot for us but less than the the cost of petrol*.

Ah, golden days, slightly singed at the edges.

*All figures checked against my own unreliable memory.

The Headmaster
Posted on: 21 June 2006, 9:25am

Just the one match will suffice.

A friend of mine, Simon Finch (hi!) went to the bar in the sports centre at Warwick University and asked for a box of matches. "We're sportsmen here" the barman said pompously, "we don't smoke", "Neither do I" Simon replied without missing a beat "but I do like to set fire to things".

The text on this page is archived from The Politically Incorrect Alphabet Forum - which unfortunately broke on August 2nd 2006 through overuse. A list of completed un-PC illustrations and their archived threads can be found here.

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